Castle Mountain

Townsville is known for 2 things: Diving and Castle Mountain. With the diving done, and a couple of hours left before the flight out I decided to climb Castle Mountain.

The promise was to see a beautiful view of Townsville and Magnetic Island. It was about 12:00 o’clock 37C and very humid. It promised to be a long walk about 2 hours of steep climbing. As a dumb European guy I started thinking I’d be fine in the sun from 12:00 to 14:00. Not a smart move there as I must have lost, without exaggeration, over 3 liters of water in those 2 hours. And burned my beloved, manly and beautifull nose.

On my way up I met up with Izzy the lizard (see the picture) and some fool running up the hill like a mountain goat. He probably thought he was doing something healthy but the heavy moaning and screeching panting told me otherwise. I thought I might have to carry this one off the mountain in a bit.

Anyway after a looong climb I find myself on top of a mountain with a fantastic view. (The refinery is circled) To my left, in the distance I can see the refinery where I worked, in front is the city and further out is Magnetic Island.
Not too bad. Right… now I’ve got to run and catch my flight back to Brisie.
All I can say: Townsville: Check!

Taking a piss

Here in oz, just about everyone takes a piss on just about everything. You cannot take anything seriously unless you’re positive it’s true. For example at a client’s there was a power fluctuation on Monday that made a backup generator kick in, this generator failed so the second backup generator started, this one burned out the master switchboard so the entire building was without power. Of course they blamed ProjectWise… After making a good case they explode into laughter… bastards :o)

It’s so bad here that there are advertisements on television warning parents… This is pretty amazing to me so: Picture it: little boy says: “Why was the Great Wall of chine built.” Dad thinks, smiles and answers: “The great emperor Nasi Goreng built this wall to keep the rabbits out of China. Big rabbit problem in China.”
The next shot is the kid standing in front of a class and the teacher saying: “Mark will now give a presentation about China.”
The Pay Off: “Don’t kid kids, they don’t know yet”.
My Pay Off: Never believe an Aussie: check first if he’s taking a piss and then check again.

Diving with Super-gropers

I am sitting on a terrace with a very tasty Cascade premium light beer sitting next to me while I’m writing this. The beer is cold and a lot of condense drips off it… I think I’ll drink it :o) and probably another one after that.

I just came back from a very good day of diving. The boat ride is about 2 hours and of course you see dolphins everywhere: they rode the wake waves of our boat for a small moment. Heaven! Or is it? I looked into the water and saw this huge yellow shark. “Aw that’s a Yellow Tiger shark said the captain. “Not really dangerous.” NOT REALLY? How’s that? Well, he said. I’ve seen a 29 foot White Shark. It was caught a few days later. 29 FOOT!!! Djzeezzuzz..

Alright, so I took the plunge anyway and came up against a very strong current. Dove down to 28 meters as quickly as possible and there she was the SS Yongala who sank a century ago, teaming with fish. There really are no words to explain how many fish there were. It was almost ridiculous. Clouds of fish, you can’t look 10 cm into because they are so dense. Absolutely incredible. The clouds are being split open by hunting trevalies, gropers, barracuda and other hunters. I have never seen so much action, everything was moving. I saw just about every fish in the ocean in that one spot.

Then suddenly: I found what I came to see a super-Groper. This one is called a Queensland groper, and its big, massive, the king of these waters. The one I saw was big enough to be very unkind so I kept my distance: It was about as big as a Volkswagen Beetle and weighs in at 500-600 kg. When I came up they said that the one I saw is called VW (what a coincidence) and isn’t even the biggest. The largest one is called Grumpy and has a hundred kilograms more.

The second dive was a lot easier, no more current as the tide had reached its peak. Again fish o’galore. Clown fish, sea snakes, trunk fish, the biggest trevalies on the planet, a huge stingray, sea turtles, a magnificent wreck and all of the sudden a beeeeeeeeep, buzz, buzz, buzz: my diving computer tells me: “get the fuck out now!”. Damn I’ve been in the water way too long, way too deep. I’m going to need decompression chamber if I don’t get out now, and more I’m flying tomorrow afternoon… This is not good, better hurry. So I reluctantly made my ascent (100 bars left) and got out. My buddy a guy from the Netherlands and I made the 2 longest dives of the day.

The captain and I talked a bit, I enjoyed watching flying-fish scatter off the bow and we even saw a fish ball being attacked from the air by sea gulls and from beneath by travelies and barracudas on the way back. What a day!

Townsville,

Townsville is about a 2 hours flight north of Brisie. I flew there this week and Internet is hard to come by here and very expensive in my hotel room. (12$ p/h) So sorry I’ve been away for a while.
I had done some work for a client so it was time to show him what I had made. I flew there, well dressed, suit, shirt, and shiny shoes, only to discover the site was a Nickel refinery site. So everything was dirty. The guys must have laughed their asses of seeing a white collar dude wearing a helmet, safety glasses, Iron nose shoes, an orange safety shirt AND a suit.
They refine huge, immense and truly gigantic amounts of nickel ore imported from New Caledonia. The Chinese buy everything and anything at any price these days so my client is doing pretty well. It’s a 35 minutes drive into the middle of nowhere and if you have no air conditioning in your car, you’re dead. Its 35C here and humidity is just about 400%.

The people here are so friendly that it’s difficult for me as a Dutch person (a tribe from the north plagued by reservations, remoteness and stand-offishnes) to remain cool. The guys I worked with came to like me and invited me to a restaurant (their treat). Isn’t that cool? One of the guys owns 2 jet skis and if I’m up to it, we’ll go jet skiing on Sunday.
In short the Hotel room : fantastic, view: fantastic, weather: waaay too hot. Work : waaay too much, People: waaaay too friendly. Had a good time. Tomorrow I’m going diving! I’ve heard there are giant gropers out there!.

Rum & driving on the left side

Mt Gay Rum. The best rum in the world. It’s a small brand made in Barbados. I was introduced to it by my lovely wife who dearly loves this elixir. I have imbibed massive quantities of this delicious drink preferably mixed with Coca Cola. Now this rum isn’t easy to come by, I’ve had it specially imported when we lived in Amersfoort by the local liquor store. Costs heaps as well.So I walk into a wine shop here to get some beer (the supermarkets don’t sell any alcohol) and what do I see? Mount Gay rum, not only that but it seems Mt Gay rum is the most popular one in Brisby! You can literally buy it on every corner of every street! This must be heaven! Bummer they don’t have any good Gouda cheese or Ouwe Kaas.

A couple of weeks ago I rented a car to do a tour. The first time you drive on the left side is tricky, dodgy and very scary they said. So with heightened senses a perfect concentration and a little nervousness I took the road. To be quite honest, the first 10 minutes are difficult, and after that there’s no problem at all. Quite easy actually. One thing remains weird, that’s when indicating direction every f*^%cking time the f&%*cking windscreen wiper would come up. The indicators are inversed.

Surf’s up

Body boarding Bassie, although my nickname is quickly turning into Bazz. (I think I'm fortunate not to have been born in Tasmania otherwise I would almost certainly be called "Bazz from Tazz").
Anyway I tried body boarding and after having swallowed a few pints of very salty water, being long enough under water for my face to turn blue, and being washed ashore like having been spat out by the sea itself, I finally got the hang of it. It’s really cool. There are plenty sharks out there so you’re not too comfortable in the water, but hey… this is the Pacific! it’s worth a risk. Next I'm taking up surfing.

Sharks

There are no ducks, no geese and no swans swimming in the Brisby river. Why’s that? Well, there are really a lot of sharks out here. The Brisby river is patrolled by bull-sharks, the most dangerous shark in the world. The beaches are patrolled by tiger sharks and the good old great white shark. Offshore, out in the ‘big blue’ you have the blue shark.’ Queensland isn’t the most dangerous place in the world… it’s the forth. :o).

There are nets in front of the more popular beaches. Unfortunately these nets also catch dolphins and sometimes baby whales. This is unacceptable to the population (We’d rather have a couple of tourists snuffing it than a baby whale, don’t we?).

Next to that there are bait buoys with big nasty hooks trying to catch as many sharks as possible. Don’t know if that’ll work as the shark will quickly be replaced by another taking its place.

Next to that there are helicopters and planes patrolling the surf (about 100 m out). That works fine as long as there is a plane or helicopter every 10 minutes.

Other than that there are lifeguards looking at the sea from a vantage point and patrolling the sea on Jet Skis.

Obviously, the Australians take this very seriously.
Now, think about the effort and think again when I tell you that only 4 people a year die of a shark accident WORLDWIDE… 4 in the entire world. Not a nice way to go, for sure, but you’d have more luck winning twice at the lottery in the same week. Bottom line, I’m not too scared.

Dolphins and manta rays!

This weekend the weather was perfect, I was on Stradbooke Island, which is the prototype Pacific Island. Palms, waves as clear as in an aquarium, perfect white sand and in the backdrop thick lush vegetation like a forest. While swimming, suddenly, in the corner of my eye I see 2 shadows shoot by. What's that! Sharks? Surfers? No, Dolphins! And they're surfing the waves. Woaw! I didn't get any pictures as I didn't have my camera handy so I'll describe it. There were about 6 of them and just like surfers they chose their waves very carefully. So they weren't all surfing the same wave at the same time. You could see them kick up lots of speed under water and then, in the crest of the wave, they'd just get their snouts out of the water, thus cutting through the water. Surfing Dolphins, it's really clear they're just having fun. This is the best thing I have ever seen in nature. Too bad it only lasted a couple of minutes. Back at the beach in front of the house we stayed at, I saw many more dolphins. I must have counted over 50 throughout the day. Excellent! Michel and I were fishing a little later along the beach when Michel spotted something big, black and fast. There were 2 Manta Rays about 3 meters out from the beach, they were very close to the shore and it looked like they were making little Manta Rays. We followed them for 500 meters and then they decided to head out to sea again. Apparently this was extremely rare as a couple of local fisherman had never seen that either when we asked them.

My Birthday

I got a little older, a little wiser. At work we had Pie and tonight I’m going to china town (Chinese new year!). My cousin invites me for the weekend at Stradbroke Island.
Stradbroke Island. This Island used to be one Island, but today there are two. Why? I hear you ask, oh my inquisitive and nosey friends. Well in the late 19th century there were 2 shipwrecks on that Island. The Scottish are renowned for their love of their number 1 export product: Whisky. In complete soberness they wrecked their ship in fair weather and clear waters.

All the whiskey washed ashore on Stradbroke Island. When people heard about it they went beachcombing and of course all that whisky disappeared quicker than a fart in a fan factory. The customs and other authority officers were not amused. So when a couple of years a new boat sank off the coast they were quicker than flies on a turd to secure the place. The second boat contained whisky all right, but most of its cargo was dynamite.

In all their wisdom the customs officers chose to blow up the boat. However, not having any pyrotechnical knowledge or experience proved to be fatal for the Island. There was so much dynamite, they blew the Island in 2 pieces.
If I do go, I’ll show you the pics.

The weather

Well, last couple of days we had a bit of rain down here. About 307 mm which is about half of what we’d expect annually. Pretty much a year worth of rain fell since I’m here. They’re only short showers but I think it’s all the water in the world coming down at once. If this keeps going like this I’m getting a hammer and start building an arc. Some parts of southern Brisie are inundated and people are being evacuated.
The sun returns every now and then to heat up everything. Remember it’s supposed to be 40C this time of year. Today I sit at my desk with no air-conditioning… it broke… and I’ve learned that:
1. My clothes are now as wet as if I’d stood in the rain but it’s perspiration
2. Every time I hit a key on my keyboard water splashes up.
3. Optical mice do not work in a pond of perspiration

I remember the days at Movares where we'd refuse to work if temperatures were greater than 28C. Bhahahahaaa. bunch of quibblers, pussies Anyway we’ve had a look at a new bureau and should be moving within a couple of months. Till then I’ll be changing my clothes twice a day. Anyway the sun's back today. Think I'll have my breakfast on the terras.

American Football

Yay It’s Super Sunday and the pub on the corner of the street is organizing “The Official Super Sunday party in Brisie”. Right after work I sprint home, change clothes, sprint to the pub and order a couple of ‘swift pints’. (the beer here is about 2.8% so as an European you need a couple).
Unfortunately American Football is about as popular as a turd in a lunchbox here in Australia. So there were about 20 Yankees and a couple guys from different nationalities having beers and looking at the game. I talked to a few and we agreed, American Football is never going to take off here in Australia. We did have a good time though, looking at a truly giant screen, yelling at the referee. The NY Giants won, we drank another beer and I went home.

Ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone

Yesterday we went for an excellent dinner on a river cruise boat. Imagine a boat in the old Mississippi riverboat style on a river winding though the city. The food was very good, seafood platter, buffet, desert, wine. Very nice. Unfortunately this dinner was the last one for quite a while. Today my wife will fly back to the Netherlands to start her new career. This is going to be a long time without her.

I gave her a “panic card”: a ticket to Australia if she misses me too much.

Just Some Pics

	Fireworks over the Brisbie river
	GoldCoast Beach
	Emmanuelle's new friends
	Sunshine Coast 1
	Sunshine Coast 2
	Brisbie center
	Barbie man

The Sun and the British

Aahhh the British. We had seen them turn from milk white to a deep tomato red colored heap of walking pain in about 2 hours in Egypt. They are the litmus test for the rest of us: You take a beefeater, put him or her in the sun and wait (in the shades) until he or she is slightly scorched. The recorded time equals the time the rest of us can safely dwell in the sun (with factor 30 that is).
Unfortunately that day we didn’t have any Brits handy so we chose to risk it all. We greased up in factor 30 twice, waited the mandatory 15 minutes before going in the sun and went for a swim. We got out of the water within an hour or so and put on our T-shirts. Drying oneself is not necessary here, as by the time you’ve reached your towel you’re dry. And yes, even that time, we burned.
I asked around and to give you an idea: when it’s really hot and sunny in the Netherlands you’d get an UV factor 6. Here in summer the UV factor is usually around 14. So that’s twice as powerful as in the Netherlands.

The Police

For my birthday, now due in one week, my wife gave me tickets to a concert of The Police. Imagine standing in a stadium with 20-30,000 others under the moon and stars while the temperature is juuuust right: fantastic!
Fergie (the one from the black eyed peas) kicked off with her music. Let me tell you one thing: she really out sucked a black hole, She tried (and I use this word loosely) to sing every genre of music, speed metal, reggae, opera and what else… She was prancing around like a little schoolgirl, out of breath, the sound was bad, her voice was bad and her show was positively embarrassing, but fun, people were laughing at her amateurism and dance silly dances as she did.
Fortunately the pain was short-lived and within minutes we heard a loud Rooooooooooxaaanne in an unmistakable, unequivocal and distinct voice. It was Sting and the gang and they rocked the place. They’ve still got the sound and the show. If they’re in the neighborhood, go and see them… But skip the Fergie part. That was a most excellent birthday gift.

The Rellos

A good Aussie word is “Rellos” or relatives in plain English. For those who don’t know I’ve actually got rellos here in Brisbie. He’s called Michel and he’s my cousin. Michel invited us for a lovely dinner with his girlfriend July. They’ve got this cute little house very near to the city center. Michel came to pick us up at 19:00 in his very wet car. Wet? You ask. Yes very wet. Now I’ve been told there’s a draught going on here in Australia… I severely doubt this. When it rains it rains cats and dogs, buckets and flat out like a lizard drinking. So Michel forgot to close the windows of his car, which by then had turned to a private swimming pool.

Don’t get me wrong, we’ve experienced only 5-6 showers, but they are severe. You walk 50 meters in one of those and you’re more wet than if you had jumped into the river. But the sun soon dries you up.

Anyway, Michel told and taught us a lot about the places to visit, we had a couple of delicious pizzas, were visited by opossums and tasted a very interesting local beer. This was a most excellent evening. Michel has made quite a nice living for himself and I'm positive we'll have heaps of fun together.

Good on ya’ mate!