Celebrate what’s great… mate

Australia day: Something like Queen’s day in the Netherland only the local color isn’t orange it’s blue but the people are just as crazy. We arrive at festivities location where beer flows freely and people are singing. Soon after I arrive I purchase a very fast cockroach for the cocky races. It’ll run in the 1pm race under the name I have given it during a short ceremony: “I dub thee Rolls Roach, may thy runnings be fast and may thy sprints be swift”. Rolls will run in the Seventh Race as the 15th entrant. By the way my name was respectably chosen as opposed to others: “Big Black Cocky, 12 inch Cocky, Circumcised Cocky”… You get the picture. Ok, so hundreds of people are sitting around the roach running arena and the names are announced to the great amusement of the crowd (“Rolls Roach” got a few laughs and some “aw that’s smart”). The roaches are marched in under the sound of bagpipes and drums. And after a loud 5…4…3…2…1… GO! The roaches are released and they run for their lives and our amusement. Within 15 seconds of absolute carnage (roaches fly around, woman duck in panic, men try to catch them and show them to their horrified wives) it’s all over.

Needless to say, Roll Roach didn’t make it. I’m sure he’s happy in heaven.