The Haka is a New Zealand way of expressing feelings and communicating with people. It basically goes like this: a group of armed to the teeth man jump out of the forest and run at you, they stop just out of striking range (about 2 meters) from you and Yell something like: AAAAHH WAI HAKI YAAAAKAAAAH!! while aggressively handling their weapons. They stick out their tongues and open their eyes wide.
After having recovered from our heart attack, the guide tells us they say something like: “hey mate, wazzup?” Right, I can see why early explorers might have deemed the Maoris as hostile or… crazy. I personally would have shot first and asked questions later. I try the haka myself and fail miserably. Emmanuelle tries a more feminine tradition and is very graceful at it.
Kiwi’s are nocturnal and very dumb animals. If you see one, you almost instantly get the unstoppable desire to kick it. This urge is so strong that I couldn’t resist yelling “kiiick the kiwi!” in the kiwi house, followed by a strict “sssshhhhht” from other embarrassed visitors.
I reckon the kiwi is not going extinct because of introduced predators, but because the locals just kick the shit out of a kiwi whenever they see one. It’s just instinct; it’s just natural; it has a proportionally giant ass on two short legs on the perfect kicking height and it always bends over.
After having recovered from our heart attack, the guide tells us they say something like: “hey mate, wazzup?” Right, I can see why early explorers might have deemed the Maoris as hostile or… crazy. I personally would have shot first and asked questions later. I try the haka myself and fail miserably. Emmanuelle tries a more feminine tradition and is very graceful at it.
Kiwi’s are nocturnal and very dumb animals. If you see one, you almost instantly get the unstoppable desire to kick it. This urge is so strong that I couldn’t resist yelling “kiiick the kiwi!” in the kiwi house, followed by a strict “sssshhhhht” from other embarrassed visitors.
I reckon the kiwi is not going extinct because of introduced predators, but because the locals just kick the shit out of a kiwi whenever they see one. It’s just instinct; it’s just natural; it has a proportionally giant ass on two short legs on the perfect kicking height and it always bends over.
Kea’s are very, very intelligent parrots living in New Zealand, we were fortunate to see some on a parking spot. They are not nice animals, they amuse themselves ripping the plastic of screen wipers and destroying plastic cabriolet rooftops. The thoroughly hated parrot is also known for ripping the kidneys out of sheep thus killing them. In the winter when food is scarce they land on a sheep’s back and start digging into the sheep. The record stands at 65 sheep killed in a single sitting. No wonder there are only 3000 kea’s left in the world as they were intensely hunted.
No comments:
Post a Comment